Throughout High School, failure was never an option. It was success, or even greater success. Things I did generally had no repercussions, and I had little difficult accomplishing what I sought out to do.
I guess two failures in two days was an extreme disappointment to me. Outside of failing my driving test the first time, I have never experienced such disheartening times in my life. Essentially, it makes me feel that who I am is not enough.
Nonetheless, I know that I have to continue, life goes on. I cannot dwell on the mistakes I made, but have to hope to continue to improve, and to become a better person.
There will be other opportunities, other moments of greatness, other moments of sadness, and I guess it's time to enter. The best moments of my life never exist without the worst moments, the deep pains.
Open wide this window.
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2 comments:
Great positive attitude. As they say, you may fail but you're never a failure, especially in God's eyes. God will open other doors.
The thing about being at the top of your high school is that you end up going to a great university. And as we all know (since we're in math) now the top 1-5% from each school is all mingled together and 50% of them will be below average, something that most of them never had to dealt with their entire life.
Everyone who has made an effort to be the top 1-5% thus far probably still wants to be in the top 1-5% now. But we know that's not going to happen because there needs to be people to make up the other 95%... lots of people in fact. Everyone potentially can get a 4.0 GPA, but only 5% of people can be in the top 5%.
The first few weeks at Waterloo is essentially a time everyone looks at themselves and wonders exactly where they stand in this new group of people. Many are in denial and refuse to believe that they are not in the top 1-5% anymore. Others refuse to believe there could be work they cannot do even if they put 100% of their effort into it, because all their lives they've spend 5% effort and gotten the grades they needed.
The important thing is how we define our failures. If it means not being #1, then 99.99999% of us will be disappointed. If you did not put 100% into something and you failed, then you can only promise yourself to put in more effort next time. If 100% was not enough, learn to accept it, learn to accept yourself.
Who you are is enough. It's not about the cards you are dealt, but how you play them. If you put all your effort into everything you do, then there should be nothing you regret or should feel disappointed in. You did what you could, what comes out of it is out of your control.
What mistakes you made in the past is out of your control. What you can control is what you make of the experience and what you do in the future.
If you did everything you could, there is nothing to feel bad about. If you didn't do everything you could, then learn from the experience and do everything you can next time. It's not about the result of what you do, it's the process.
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